One of the things that new moms always say about their baby is “I’m so proud to be her mom.” I’ve had about 12 friends have new babies in the last year alone, and I swear every single one of them have said this. “I’m so proud to be Ellie’s mom.” “I’m so proud to be Finn’s mom.” “I’m so proud to be Annie’s mom.”
I used to think this was so weird.
I mean, of all of the things they could say, they go on and on about how proud that they are to be that specific human being’s mom. Their baby is just a baby. They hadn’t accomplished much yet in their tiny life to deserve this beaming pride, and to me, their baby was like every other baby. Sure, I know she was proud because that child was hers, but I just figured you’d say something else more applicable, like, “I’m so excited to have a baby!” I always found it interesting—and strange—that moms always said this about their child. They are all just so proud to be their baby’s mom.
Then I became a mom. And everything changes when you become a mom. You begin to understand things that you never understood before.
I am just so proud to be Carter’s mom! I feel like I’m going to explode with pride, and there is nothing more amazing in my life or impressive that I’ve ever done that even comes close to how I feel about being Carter’s mom. And not anyone’s mom—Carter’s mom. Everything I’ve ever done in my life pales in comparison to this honor that I have.
Last week, as I was in my bathroom putting on makeup for the day, I was thinking about how weird I used to think this was and how much I understood it now. As my mind wandered to how amazing and perfect Carter is and how proud I am to be his mom, I heard God’s still, small voice interrupt my thoughts and say this:
Christy, do you want to know something? That’s how I feel about you.
Y’all. I’m fighting back tears as I write this even now.
Can you imagine that? Most days, honestly, I can’t. I know intellectually and in my heart that God loves me but until that very moment, I don’t think I had ever really considered that He was proud of me. And not an obligatory kind of pride either. He is genuinely proud of me. And He’s proud of you.
Being a type-A, hard-driving, achiever-type myself, I need that reminder. I spend most of my days beating myself up for everything I haven’t done so when that still, small voice whispered when I least expected it, it was water to my soul and a sigh of deep relief. I’m so proud of you. You don’t have to perform, and you don’t have to try to earn it. Right now, today, exactly where you are, God is so proud of you.
The God of the Universe, the One who put the stars in the sky, knows you by name. Like your tiny baby, even though you haven’t accomplished anything and even though there are billions of other people in the world, God wants you to know this:
You want to know something about that overwhelming, beaming, about-to-explode pride? That’s how I feel about you.