What I Learned About Girls From Bringing Up Boys

As the mother of a two-year-old and a seven-month-old, right now I’m diving into all the information I can get about raising my two little guys. I didn’t have any brothers growing up, and I have a challenging enough time trying to figure out my husband on a daily basis, so a few months ago, I turned to a book by Dr. James Dobson called Bringing Up Boys. As I was reading through, one passage practically jumped off the page and caught my attention:

“A recent study confirmed that girls are more fearful than boys. For example, they brake sooner when riding their bikes.”

Isn’t that interesting? Girls brake sooner than boys. Girls tend to be a little bit more nervous and cautious. Dr. Dobson goes on:

“They react more negatively to pain, and try not to make the same mistake twice. Boys, on the other hand, are slower to learn from calamities (Christy note: Those of you with boys, can I get an ‘Amen’?!) They tend to think that their injuries are caused by ‘bad luck.’ Maybe they’ll have better luck next time.”

Y’all, I couldn’t help but think of the implications of this—and not just with children. If you have kids, you know boys and girls are so different! But men and women are different, too. We have unique challenges and also unique opportunities in business. God has created and wired us that way.

We’re incredibly relational, we go above and beyond with customer service, we’re exceptional at details, and we’re amazingly perceptive and intuitive. We have all these strengths that we bring to business that are very distinctive to us!

But we also have challenges. Think about the boys’ and girls’ bike study, and how that concept follows us into adulthood. We are less risky than men—which may explain why car insurance rates are higher for men than women, right? We brake quicker than men do, even when it comes to business.

We’re a little bit more scared of risk.

When we make a mistake, we don’t want to make that same mistake again.

If you’ve followed me for any length of time, you may have heard me talk about or read my blog about the speaking event that still haunts me to this day. I absolutely bombed. I drove home from that event bawling my eyes out. You know what I told myself on that drive home?

“Never again.”

I didn’t want to put myself out there ever again. I didn’t ever want to feel that pain, failure, hurt, embarrassment and rejection ever again.

Related: The Truth About The Lies Fear Tells You

But if I would have given up that day, I never would have experienced the progress I feel today. Business Boutique wouldn’t be a thing, and thousands of women and business owners would have gone unserved. It’s our nature as women to avoid (like the plague!) making the same mistake twice.

We are called for more, friends. You’re going to make mistakes. I’m going to make mistakes. We’re going to have setbacks. There will be people who reject your ideas, your products, and your services. There will be people who straight up don’t like you! I know that it hurts, and I know that people can be mean.

But don’t let that stop you from doing what God’s called you to do.

Because even though we might be a little bit more scared than men are sometimes, if we want to succeed in business, we have to be willing to fail. We have to pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, get back on the horse, and do the thing again anyway.